I Am What I Yam . . .

I love the fact that I grew up in the '50s. My memory of the milkman coming into our kitchen and looking in our icebox (which is what we called it then, even though it wasn't) to see what we needed probably sounds like a made-up story to a kid today. The milkman knew how much cottage cheese we ate, how much milk we drank, and that my mom loved buttermilk and cornbread on Sundays. Sometimes he'd wink and tell my mom he thought we needed a quart of chocolate milk. Even when I think about it now, it seems surreal. I also love the memory of the knock on the door Saturday morning that announced someone selling a sack of six glazed donuts for a quarter. What a treat that was! Without even knowing it, values were being instilled and memories being built.

My childhood was one of order and trust. Our routine wasn't elaborate, it was just orderly. We cleaned house on Saturdays, but we went to the library first. We ate dinner as a family. And there was no reading allowed at the table. The kids did the dishes and swept the kitchen floor. And then there's that sweet memory of being outside on the sidewalk playing and hearing my mom through the kitchen window saying, "Oh, Paul, let them play. I'll do the dishes." We weren't the Cleavers, but we were damn close.

Appreciating the principles that are an established part of ourselves helps us to realize how grounded we truly are. The things that have influenced us the most are not always apparent to us in our everyday lives. I think it helps to take the time to become aware of the main beliefs that guide us. All of those childhood experiences are an essential part of who I am and who I have become.

We all have quirks, we all have essentials. Take some time to think about how those came about. It can be rather enlightening.

Versatile Blogger Award

Cindy at Cindy's Clipboard has awarded me this award:


To accept this award I have to:
* reveal 7 truths about myself
* select 7 blogs that I would like to share the award with

So here are my seven truths:
1. Given a choice, I will make something rather than buy it. Food, gifts, cards, you get the picture. This causes extreme angst at times, the pressure I put on myself.

2. I always score 50-50 in right brain-left brain tests. This may sound cool, but creates conflict within me most of the time.

3. I eat mostly vegetarian although I don't call myself such. Beef is rare in my diet these days.

4. I love the internet. Immediate gratification. Don't know how I existed without it.

5. My sister and I are all that's left of our immediate family. She lives in Germany.

6. I'm a believer in "third time's the charm" since I found true love in my third marriage.

7. I'm still a reader of books and newspapers, even though I'm connected online. I will have a difficult time giving up the tactile experience of reading a book.

Seven blogs I'd like to see participate:

1. Sarah in Disturbia

2. WordMarks A Journal

3. Collagitation

4. Fifth Child Studio

5. Eat, Drink, Decorate

6. Simple Living with a Dash of Chaos

7. Echoes of Grace

No Underestimating Allowed

I'm one of those people who hesitates to throw away paper scraps, bits of ribbon, foil wine tops, Chinese newspapers, you name it and I can call it a "treasure." I have a box devoted to these things. The label on the end says "Don't underestimate what's in here!" Every now and then I open it up and go through it. I have some amazing things in there. It's a project waiting to happen.

Sometimes I think I should label each day with "Don't underestimate what I have in store." It all goes back to You are what you manifest. Walking out the door with a mindful thought of seeing the positive.

The meditation quote on that appeared on Kathleen Botsford's Echoes of Grace blog today spoke to me in a fierce way.

What if we set out every morning with curiosity,
with the intention to notice
as many opportunities as possible?
Would it not be like reading the world
as a holy book~a Lectio Divina of sorts,
that ancient practice of spiritual reading?
Every day we could be pouring over
the unfolding of new and possible worlds.

There are innumerable, small opportunities
to be helpful, attentive or kind.
Taking up these opportunities,
would we not come to know that we are
a living part of the infinite story?

Gunilla Norris

Some days I'm struck by the people, random people, who make me smile. It's all good. And it's a gift. And that's my goal today. To give a gift.

Vacancy: Chairman of the Universe

I took a break today, left the office and went to the bookstore. I walked around the New Age spiritual section, the self-improvement section, pop psychology section, but the place where I got the advice I needed was in the card section.

A retro card with a woman on the phone saying "I have resigned my job as chairman of the universe." And it slapped me in the face. I'm trying to control way too much and I need to stop it. Get over myself. Resign that position.

Maybe now my face will relax.

Happy Thoughts

I'm reading The Art of Racing in the Rain right now, and until last night, I'd been saying what a sweet book it was. Last night it turned ugly and I had to put it down. I couldn't deal with injustice to anyone at the moment, not even on a page. I couldn't be witness to meanness. Right now I need peace and light and happy thoughts.

I am enjoying this book so much, though. One thought or phrase that is used frequently (because the guy is a race car driver), is "The car goes where your eyes go." "That which you manifest you are."

Today I will manifest peace and light and happy thoughts.

Gansta Luv

I watched Public Enemies with Johnny Depp tonight. I decided I could have been a Doll in the '30s. What does that say about me? What is it about gangsters that were romantic? Why do I root for the bad guy?

Here's what Ryan Adams of Awards Daily said:
Gangster lore resonates because the struggle to rebel against a tyrannical social system that seeks to keep huge segments of the population under the thumb of bloodsucking bureaucratic control is as old as civilization itself. Rarely is the positive identification with thieves so clean-cut as with a Robin Hood legend, but when the failed banks, evaporated savings, and brutal foreclosures of the great depression ruined the lives of so many families, it’s little wonder that any rascally individual who dared come along and stick it to the bankers would be regarded with a complex mixture of revulsion and awe, fear and admiration.

This seems like a whole lot of words to say Johnny Depp is hot.

Right Now

I'm not very creative right now. All my energies are being spent at work on drama and change. I come home exhausted and I wake up writing pep talks. Ugh. Can't we all just be nice to each other?