Monday, May 26, 2008

New Look, New Lease

I need to get outta this rut so I thought I'd brighten up my blog page. A small start. For whatever reason, I'm just not inspired lately. I look at my magazines and see great ideas but I can't find the where-with-all to jump in and try anything. Today it's raining so I won't be able to use working outside as an escape -- maybe I'll make myself do something creative, anything, to jumpstart this head (or is it heart) of mine.

On the flip side though, because I'm not working inside doing anything, my outside world is looking great. I'm getting rid of a ton of monkey grass that has taken over the azalea bed. I advertised it on craigslist as "FREE--you dig it, you keep it" and I got 9 responses. Two people came over yesterday and dug for about an hour each and there's still plenty left. Come to think of it, that's pretty creative thinking:)

I'm wrestling with adjusting to the way age (and probably menopause) is affecting my body. It's downright depressing. I look in the mirror and I don't even recognize my body sometimes. It's a constant head dialogue of should I eat this, give up this, try this, why don't I exercise more, I should lift weights, stand up straight, try pilates, throw out clothes that don't fit, be comfortable, forget it, no more wine, to hell with it, and so forth. It gets really old. But this morning as I sit with the doors open, listening to birds sing about the rain, I love life--including my ample body.

My expectations for myself have always a little out of whack. Maybe it's time to work on releasing some of that.

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